I Thought I Lost a Tampon Inside Me (I Hadn’t Even Used One)

Ever panicked because you couldn’t find your tampon string? That happened to me, and it turned out the tampon was never there. That humiliating moment became my wake-up call: I was living so fast I couldn’t even notice my own body. Here’s what I learned about slowing down, reconnecting, and why presence matters for pleasure.

Can You Really Forget If You Inserted a Tampon?

It was pre-COVID, back when my days were fueled by back-to-back meetings, endless emails, and a never-ending to-do list. I’d earned two promotions at work and was part of the executive management team. I was the definition of burnout – successful on paper, completely disconnected from my body.

On this particular day, I darted into the bathroom to change my tampon — except there was no string. No tampon. Nothing at all.

I was horrified. How could it just disappear?

Horror washed over me. How could a tampon just disappear? Where did it go? Was it stuck somewhere dangerous?

I immediately Googled “lost tampon inside me” and found terrifying stories about toxic shock syndrome. I called my best friend. She had never heard of anything like this. I called my mom, who said something similar happened once and urged me to see a gynecologist immediately.

What Happens When You Can’t Find Your Tampon String

The next day, there I was, up on the exam table.

Doc: “It’s not there. In fact, there’s nothing there.”
Me: “Are you sure?”
Doc: “Positively. There’s no tampon inside you.”

That’s when it hit me. Damn, did I insert or remove a tampon?

I honestly couldn’t recall. I wasn’t dealing with a lost tampon inside me. I was dealing with being so disconnected from my body that I forgot if I put a tampon in at all.

Signs You’re Disconnected From Your Body

The embarrassment quickly shifted into something deeper and more concerning. I had been so busy, rushing from place to place, task to task, that my body was completely on autopilot. I couldn’t remember a basic detail about my own body.

How many women live this way? Too busy to eat lunch, too stressed to breathe deeply, so numb we barely notice what’s happening in our own bodies. We push through period cramps, ignore hunger signals, and forget if we put a tampon in.

This level of body disconnection and burnout has become normalized, especially for high-achieving women. But normal doesn’t mean healthy.

Here are the signs you might be disconnected from your body too:

• You eat at your desk without tasting your food.
• You realize you’ve been holding your breath during stressful moments.
• You can’t remember the last time you felt truly relaxed.
• Sex feels mechanical or numb, or you wonder if your body is broken because arousal seems impossible.

How Burnout Affects Your Sexual Pleasure

When you’re disconnected from your body in daily life, that same numbness appears in the bedroom. When you’re constantly rushing, dropping into arousal becomes nearly impossible. When you’re on autopilot, sex can feel mechanical or completely numb. And when you’re disconnected from your body, you might find yourself faking orgasms or wondering why pleasure seems so elusive.

Your body isn’t broken. It’s simply waiting for your attention and presence.

The Vulva Hug: My Daily Reconnection Practice

As a certified BodySex facilitator and pleasure coach, I now understand the importance of reconnecting with my sexual self in small, simple ways. One of my favorite tools? The vulva hug.

It’s as simple as placing both hands over your vulva, taking a breath, and allowing yourself to just feel your own presence. No rush. No agenda. Just being with yourself.

This practice has become my anchor. Every day I hug my vulva — hands on my body, breath steady, reconnecting. That small act tells my nervous system: I’m here. I’m safe. I’m worthy of slowing down. And the more I do this, the more connected I am to my body and my vulva.

Why Presence Matters for Pleasure

My tampongate (lol) panic was a serious wake-up call. That tampon panic was about body desperately trying to get my attention. When we ignore our bodies, they don’t simply shut down. They whisper, then shout, then scream for attention.

Stress, burnout, numbness, and missing pleasure are all signals that our bodies need care, not criticism. The path back to connection doesn’t require hours of meditation or expensive retreats. It starts with simple practices like the vulva hug, taking three deep breaths, or placing your hands on your body with intention.

FAQs About Body Disconnection

Q: Can you really forget if you inserted a tampon? A: Yes, absolutely. When we’re operating on autopilot due to stress and burnout, we can forget basic body functions. It’s more common than you might think, especially among busy women who are disconnected from their bodies.

Q: What is a vulva hug? A: A vulva hug involves placing both hands over your vulva area, breathing deeply, and simply being present with yourself. It’s a gentle practice of reconnection that takes just 30 seconds to 2 minutes.

Q: How does the vulva hug help with body connection? A: The vulva hug brings your attention back to your body in a caring, non-sexual way. It helps regulate your nervous system and builds a practice of daily body awareness.

Q: Can being too busy really affect sexual pleasure? A: Absolutely. When you’re disconnected from your body during daily life, that same disconnection appears during intimate moments. Presence is essential for pleasure, and you can’t be present if you’re always on autopilot.

Q: Is this level of burnout normal? A: Unfortunately, yes. Many women operate on autopilot, especially high achievers and busy mothers. But normal doesn’t mean healthy.

Q: How long does it take to reconnect with your body? A: With consistent daily practices like the vulva hug, many women report feeling more connected within a week. Deep reconnection is an ongoing journey, but small improvements happen quickly.

Want support reconnecting with your body and your pleasure?That’s exactly what we explore inside The Pleasure Lab, my 6-week program for women ready to come home to their bodies.

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